Surprising Books
I made a surprising discovery I'm going to share with you. This happened about a year ago.
My books have a lot of sex scenes. Not erotica-level sex scenes: not super detailed or kinky. I make them part of telling the story. The problem I was having was that I didn't know how I was doing because I hadn't read many books that depicted sex in the manner that I was. I needed an example in published literature.
What popular book depicts sex in a way I can study to see how I'm doing?
There was only one I could come up with. So, I purchased Fifty Shades of Grey. Much to my astonishment, it was actually a really good book. The story was good and the writing was excellent. The characters flew of the page, even minor ones. I read it in two days, then went out and bought Fifty Shades Darker and Fifty Shades Freed. Within a week, I'd read the entire series.
I have the movies now as well, having gotten the last movie a few weeks ago, and I listen to the soundtracks on YouTube. The soundtracks are awesome, especially the last one.
Reading the books helped me with what I needed, and I decided that I was doing okay with my sex scenes. I've had a lot of compliments on them on the peer review website I'm on so my confidence wasn't misplaced.
I'll admit that the sex is half the fun in reading the Fifty Shades series, but the real reason I like the series is the character of Christian Grey. It's not finding him attractive or wishing someone like him would find me. I identify with his character.
Christian Grey has PTSD, though the author never names the disorder. She names all the symptoms, but never the disorder. The BDSM is Christan trying to cope with life in a very strange way. He craves control and the dominant/submissive relationships give him an outlet for having that level of control. Ana forces him to re-evaluate the way he copes with life and develop new coping mechanisms. Essentially he has to completely readjust the way he deals with the world around him, and he does it because he loves her. He fails a lot and he screws up a lot, but he's doing something very, very difficult.
I understand what it means to have the illness Christian lives with and how difficult it is to cope with life through the disorder. With one foot stuck in the past, it's hard to live in the present. I find myself trying to control a lot of things around me and it's really hard not to be controlling. Negative coping skills are easy to develop and sometimes work better than positive ones. I used to cut myself, developed compulsive overeating disorder, and shopped compulsively. They all helped and gave me a measure of control over myself, especially the first two. I still have urges to do them all, but have to redirect my urges into other things. It's hard. Quitting cutting myself was one of the hardest things I've ever done.
As I read the Fifty Shades series and watch Christian's growth as a character, I feel for him and how much he struggles. I identify with how hard he works and how difficult it is to do what he's doing. It's good to read about a character who struggles with something I struggle with. It's a reminder that I'm not alone.
So, yes, I'm a Fifty Shades fan, but not for the same reason as most of the others.
I'm going to post reviews of the series.
My books have a lot of sex scenes. Not erotica-level sex scenes: not super detailed or kinky. I make them part of telling the story. The problem I was having was that I didn't know how I was doing because I hadn't read many books that depicted sex in the manner that I was. I needed an example in published literature.
What popular book depicts sex in a way I can study to see how I'm doing?
There was only one I could come up with. So, I purchased Fifty Shades of Grey. Much to my astonishment, it was actually a really good book. The story was good and the writing was excellent. The characters flew of the page, even minor ones. I read it in two days, then went out and bought Fifty Shades Darker and Fifty Shades Freed. Within a week, I'd read the entire series.
I have the movies now as well, having gotten the last movie a few weeks ago, and I listen to the soundtracks on YouTube. The soundtracks are awesome, especially the last one.
Reading the books helped me with what I needed, and I decided that I was doing okay with my sex scenes. I've had a lot of compliments on them on the peer review website I'm on so my confidence wasn't misplaced.
I'll admit that the sex is half the fun in reading the Fifty Shades series, but the real reason I like the series is the character of Christian Grey. It's not finding him attractive or wishing someone like him would find me. I identify with his character.
Christian Grey has PTSD, though the author never names the disorder. She names all the symptoms, but never the disorder. The BDSM is Christan trying to cope with life in a very strange way. He craves control and the dominant/submissive relationships give him an outlet for having that level of control. Ana forces him to re-evaluate the way he copes with life and develop new coping mechanisms. Essentially he has to completely readjust the way he deals with the world around him, and he does it because he loves her. He fails a lot and he screws up a lot, but he's doing something very, very difficult.
I understand what it means to have the illness Christian lives with and how difficult it is to cope with life through the disorder. With one foot stuck in the past, it's hard to live in the present. I find myself trying to control a lot of things around me and it's really hard not to be controlling. Negative coping skills are easy to develop and sometimes work better than positive ones. I used to cut myself, developed compulsive overeating disorder, and shopped compulsively. They all helped and gave me a measure of control over myself, especially the first two. I still have urges to do them all, but have to redirect my urges into other things. It's hard. Quitting cutting myself was one of the hardest things I've ever done.
As I read the Fifty Shades series and watch Christian's growth as a character, I feel for him and how much he struggles. I identify with how hard he works and how difficult it is to do what he's doing. It's good to read about a character who struggles with something I struggle with. It's a reminder that I'm not alone.
So, yes, I'm a Fifty Shades fan, but not for the same reason as most of the others.
I'm going to post reviews of the series.
Photo Credit: Katherine Elizabeth
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